Love is Blind After the Altar: Two Years Later
It's been almost a year and a half since I wrote my first post on Nick and Vanessa Lachey’s Atlanta-based dating experiment Love is Blind. And what a year it has been! Not even 24 hours after publishing it, Nashville was hit with a devastating tornado (that many of us weren’t anticipating or prepared for). Barely 2 weeks later, covid lockdowns began. An entire block of downtown was bombed on Christmas Day. And a month after that, I went on a ski trip that I returned from in a few more pieces than when I left. But hey! It wasn’t all bad! *laughing so I don’t cry*
I’ll admit, I didn’t watch as much TV as everyone else until I was forced on the couch for a few months, and then I watched basically all of Netflix. And when Netflix — the original pioneer of quarantine dating — announced ANOTHER Love is Blind reunion, well, I was all in.
Also, several of you messaged me when you saw the preview to let me know it was happening, and I thought that was REAL CUTE!
So here we are, almost 17 months later. I’ll admit, the only cast member I’ve actually kept up with is Jessica (and Payton, DUH). I’ve made some assumptions, and I’m curious to see if I’m right…Not even a minute and a half in, I audibly gasped and said, “I’m sorry, WHAT?” This is sure to be a wild ride!
The cast enters the venue, some with their partner, some on their own. We all knew Cameron and Lauren were going to be together. But if you haven’t kept up with the cast on social media, there are a few curveballs. There’s been a lot of speculation as to whether Damian and Giannina, who didn’t actually wed at the Love is Blind altar but were together at the last reunion, are still dating. They show the wedding scene, and it's just as painful as I remembered. She says she can’t picture her life without him, but honestly, I still don’t get this relationship. No, it isn’t for me to get. But G seemed way different at the last reunion. Submissive. And I don’t feel like that’s on brand for her, but again, I do not know her so…I’ll just say maybe she really does love him, or maybe she’s not used to being the one getting dumped and is in the relationship to re-hash and attempt to change the past (impossible, but we’ve all done it). Who knows. She tells her mom they’re having problems, and her mom keeps telling her they’re perfect together which is funny because they obviously aren’t. But no relationship is. Maybe G feels the pressure to make it work because of the nature of the show. Or maybe she’s seen how other cast members have been treated post breakup and doesn’t want to experience the same fate.
GIRL. NO.
Lauren and Cameron are having their families over for her birthday, and they’re obviously close. They’re hugging and kissing each other on the cheek. My dad would give a head nod and maybe a handshake to my in-laws, and that is IT. It’s cute to see them all together! Lauren’s dad was initially pretty hesitant about their relationship because of how it began. Maybe he’s just not a fan of 98 degrees? But they’re very much in love. You can tell by the way they look at one another. Cameron gives a sweet little speech about how thankful he is for Lauren, and I will now need my husband to do this at all future gatherings, regardless of whether it’s my birthday or not. They tell their parents they're doing a double anniversary party with the Barnetts, and I’m shocked that Barnett is plural because, I mean, did you watch the show? I guess this is less of a double date situation and more of an actual party, and the whole cast has been invited — even Jessica.
They’re already planting the seeds for drama and typically I’d be excited, but I’m just so annoyed because Jessica’s endured A LOT and you already know how I feel about this but in case you don’t, here you go. I know there’s only so much material to work with, and it would be boring to watch them all smile at each other for 45 minutes, but come on. Mark and his new baby are brought up, and I guess I lied earlier because I did keep up with him a little bit. It was hard not to when he was popping up in my feed left and right! Claims that he cheated on Jessica with a producer of the show during filming. Then claims of multiple women. All the while, Jessica remained tight lipped. She was getting dragged left and right for leaving him at the altar, for talking to Barnett, for drinking wine, for having a high pitched voice, for basically existing. And while he was giving his sob story to every morning news show in America, he was leading a double life. Shady! And then all of a sudden he's going to be a dad? Boy moves quick!
Speaking of kids, Lauren’s brother wants to know when she and Cameron are having kids, and I appreciate her response because it's honest. It's her body that has to carry and nurture the child and experience the wonder and the physical and emotional trauma, and she’s scared. Me too, Lauren. Me too. She says they’ll start trying soon and Cameron is super supportive, saying he’s ready when she is. Lauren’s dad, Bill, is the real star of the show. He gives his stamp of approval, and you can tell there’s a lot of weight behind it. Like, if he hosted or judged a dating show on Netflix, I would 1000% watch.
Side bar: do we forgive Cameron for rapping yet? Y/N?
Diamond is on her way to the…carwash? She slaps on some heels that she about rolls her ankle in *TRIGGERED* and struts off to meet Ebony. Wait, the carwash is actually a club? My first job was at a carwash, and it was def not this glamorous and now I’m a little pissed lol. In what is not a staged event at all, Ebony has set Diamond up on a blind date. Y’all, I thought Ebony was trying to set her up with a guy that looked like Carlton, but that’s actually her boyfriend. Phewwwww! Rumeal and Diamond are hitting it off, and they’re asking all the typical get to know you questions when Diamond busts out the standard “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” I was just asked this in an interview, and I literally said, “Hopefully with a few more dogs.” I did not get that job, and that answer might have been why. BUT ANYWAYS. Diamond and Rumeal, whose raspy voice and good looks should make him a shoe-in for the next film in the Batman franchise, seem like a potential match! And then he says this
🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
SMALL BOOBS ARE COOL, TOO, YOU WANKER.
We go to date night with the Barnetts, and I’d kind of rather not. This feels a little high brow for them, which I guess is why we then follow them cruising around on ATVs and picnicking. Also, I thought this was an ATV but had to google to be sure and now feel embarrassed to admit it because I’m from Georgia and should know better. Anyways, they genuinely seem like they’re happy, and that’s great! They discuss the anniversary party guest list, and Voldemort (AKA Jessica) comes up, and I’m kinda mad my BFF and I do this about our former coworker and now this is something we have in common with the Barnetts. Amber says she has no interest in associating with Jessica, which is fine. But Jessica wished them well and apologized at the last reunion, and I feel like Amber just really made a meal of it. It’s been a long time. Literally everyone has moved on from it besides her. Get over it. And yeah, it’s prob weird that she’s at their anniversary party, but she wouldn’t be there if there weren’t a camera crew filming the entire thing so…She says she’s mastered the act of pretending someone doesn’t exist, and I beg to differ at the way she is still. bringing. this. up. Barnett tries to tell her she doesn’t have to interact with her, and you already know that isn’t happening. And you also know he isn’t going to do anything based on his actions at the last reunion. Is anyone else already stressed out?? Because I am stressed OUT.
Lauren, wearing a t-shirt with cartoon versions of her and Cameron on it LOL, meets Carlton for some really yummy looking cocktails (Atlanta people, where is this place??). He tells her he’s not really a part of the group, and I’m not surprised. He was messy on the show and honestly just mean. I feel for him because I can’t imagine what it must be like to be on the receiving end of that kind of backlash. Carlton feels like an outsider, and obviously craves to be accepted by the rest of the group. Lauren tells him he needs to accept himself, and he gets defensive, which I feel like is his achilles heel. He doesn’t owe any of us an explanation for his behavior. But he can’t help but dredge up the past. Lauren is trying to help him talk through it, but he becomes increasingly defensive and I can feel my blood pressure rising and you hear sirens and see flashing lights and that seems like way more of a metaphor than him being attacked by sharks at the beach. Who are the sharks supposed to be? Carlton brings up biphobia in the Black community, and while that’s something I can’t speak to personally, I hate that that’s his experience. And I wish he would see a therapist because there's clearly a lot going on there. He makes some low blow comments to Lauren before storming out on her. Oof.
Why are we finger pointing. This is not a good look.
Damian, Cameron, and Barnett are at the gym together which would never happen if Netflix wasn’t involved. Also, can you get pregnant from looking at a man’s arm veins? Asking for a friend. And that friend is Lauren. WOW. BE CAREFUL, GURL. Damn! The guys are asking each other about having kids, and Barnett seems a little down in his segment. He says he sold his house to pay off Amber’s student loans, which were only $20k. I mean, I know that’s a lot. But mine are like 4x that (not to brag or anything) and aren’t going to be paid off until 2035. That’s what happens when you go to a private Baptist college out of state. Not everyone can ball out like me. I get it. He basically says they’re not not trying to have kids, which means they’ll prob be next on deck to shoot out a LIB baby. Except they’re living in an apartment and have a roommate, which isn’t ideal. But they’re in love! They can do anything! Damian shares his relationship woes. It’s been 2 years, and neither of them have asked the other to marry them again. I mean, G did it the first time and he ditched her at the altar, so I feel like it’s kind of on him this time? Barnett has been uncomfortable the entire conversation, biting his lip and crossing his arms. These guys clearly do not hang out IRL lol. Damian wants to be with G, but right now it’s a big question mark. Something in me does not trust Damian and feel like he might be controlling? But I’m not a good judge of character so Damian, if you’re reading this, message me and plead your case. I’ll def believe you.
OH REALLY? LOLOLOLOL
LC is having drinks with Diamond and discussing her current relationship status which is basically just hanging out with her cat (not a euphemism). I respect it. I’m sad we didn’t get to see more of LC because she seems like a really cool girl. And Barnett likes the crazy, so it’s probably best things didn’t work out there. G shows up, and it’s girl’s night out! I love a good GNO! They’re hugging and complimenting each other’s outfits. Ugh, girls are the best. G shows off her nails, and the other 2 ask where the ring is 👀 G is pretty noncommittal in her response.
Diamond commiserates. I love her quick wit. Jessica shows up, and she might be the only cast member that no longer lives in Atlanta, so she likely hasn’t seen any of the girls since the last reunion, especially with covid in play. She says she crashed and burned in front of the world, and I can tell she’s still hurting from the way she was treated. It bums me out. No one’s life deserves to be defined by their worst moments, which I still maintain weren’t bad. She was a human. She was honest. You all know I love Jessica so I will stop now. G tears up talking about Damian. They don’t live together, and she mentions that she doesn’t know if he’s exclusively with her. YIKES. Diamond is like “girl what are you doing?” and I agree. She is trauma bonded to this man or something. Alexa, play “Let it Go.”
Jessica talks about her boyfriend who I’m just now learning is a foot surgeon?? Jessica! Where was this information 6 months ago? LMAOOOO. I’m apparently not a very good stalker. But for real, her boyfriend is super cute and not attending the reunion which bums me out. Part of me wants an arm wrestling competition between Dr. Ben and Barnett. Maybe we could coordinate that. For charity! And for my satisfaction 😂😂😂😂😂
LOOK HOW FREAKING CUTE THEY ARE ❤️
Jessica tags LC into the convo because she dated Mark after the show. LC says Mark cheated on her and lied to her face about it, and if he apologized, it would be followed by something along the lines of, “but you weren’t my girlfriend at the time.” Jessica breaks down because she considers herself to be one of the most hated people to ever be on a reality show, and Mark pretty much watched it happen and did absolutely nothing. Now Mark is with his girlfriend who’s pregnant, and while the girls are hopeful he remains faithful, his track record shows that’s unlikely.
Damian is out on the town and talking about cars and I literally do not care about this storyline at all but he is meeting with a mystery woman who turns out to be FRANCESCA FROM TOO HOT TO HANDLE? Uh yes, I watched that dumpster fire, too. And I did kind of keep up with Fran because she hooked up with Harry who is so attractive it should be criminal. They got engaged and then she left him for another woman and is now with Damian? Damian is getting all of these hot women and I mean good for him I guess? Also, why haven’t we talked about my girl Kelly yet?? FOCUS, NATALIE. He says the paps got pics of him out with Francesca and G was pretty upset. That’s when she should’ve bounced out, but apparently she didn’t because she’s still crying about him at girl’s nights so idk. Damian says he’s good at solving problems so he’ll figure this out, and I don’t like that language. Giannina is not a problem!
Apparently Francesca just so happens to be in Atlanta for a photoshoot at the same time as the reunion. I am not fooled. Does Kris Jenner work for Netflix now? They’re flirting back and forth and Fran touches her hair about 70 times. Do I need to do this to be hot? Hot people reading this please chime in in the comments.
The episode ends and I’m just now realizing there are 2 more episodes after this one. Ooops! This episode really flew by!
